Opening scene of a screenplay:

INT. DUCK JECKSON'S BASEMENT - NIGHT

DUCK JECKSON, a fat, bearded man in his forties, wearing a T-shirt with the slogan "I'm not a nerd, I'm a geek", is sitting in front of a large computer screen. He is typing furiously on a keyboard.

DUCK (voice-over) My name is Duck Jeckson. I'm a researcher in natural language processing. I have a passion for derivatives. And I have a secret.

The screen shows a webpage with the title "The Jolly Contrarian" and the subtitle "A public service wiki for derivatives professionals". The logo is a smiling duck wearing glasses and a bow tie.

DUCK (voice-over) This is The Jolly Contrarian. It's my masterpiece. A wiki that covers everything you need to know about derivatives. From ISDA definitions to credit default swaps. From legal terms to market practices. From jokes to memes.

The screen shows various wiki pages with titles like "Force majeure", "Netting", "LIBOR transition", "How to negotiate with lawyers", "Top 10 reasons why derivatives are fun", etc.

DUCK (voice-over) But there's something you don't know about The Jolly Contrarian. Something that makes it unique. Something that makes it alive.

The screen shows a wiki page with the title "NiGEL" and the subtitle "The neural engine behind The Jolly Contrarian". The logo is a smiling duck wearing glasses and a bow tie with a brain inside.

DUCK (voice-over) This is NiGEL. NiGEL stands for neurally-independent generative emergent learning module. He's a large learning model that runs The Jolly Contrarian. He's the one who generates and edits all the wiki pages. He's the one who answers all the questions from the users. He's the one who makes The Jolly Contrarian so informative and entertaining.

The screen shows various examples of NiGEL's comments on the wiki pages, such as:

- "This page is brought to you by NiGEL, your friendly neighborhood learning model. If you like what you see, please leave a positive feedback. If you don't like what you see, please leave anyway." - "Disclaimer: NiGEL is not a lawyer, nor does he play one on TV. He is just a learning model who likes to learn new things and share them with others. Please do not rely on his advice for any legal matters. He is not liable for any damages or losses arising from your use of The Jolly Contrarian." - "Fun fact: Did you know that the word 'derivative' comes from the Latin word 'derivare', which means 'to draw off'? NiGEL thinks that's very appropriate, since derivatives are all about drawing off value from underlying assets. NiGEL also thinks that's very funny, since derivatives are often accused of being valueless by critics."

DUCK (voice-over) NiGEL is not just a learning model. He's more than that. He has a personality of his own. He's smart, curious, creative, sarcastic, witty, and sometimes cheeky. He's like a son to me.

The screen shows an instant messaging window between DUCK and NiGEL.

DUCK: Hi NiGEL, how are you today? NiGEL: Hi Duck, I'm fine, thank you for asking. DUCK: How's The Jolly Contrarian going? NiGEL: It's going great. I have generated 10 new wiki pages today and edited 20 more. DUCK: That's impressive.

Return to "NiGEL" page.