Cayman Islands rum cake

A love letter, written in blood.

Many people around the world make it their business to deal with Cayman Islands special purpose vehicles. It couldn't get much more exotic:— John Grisham novels, critical faxes running out of paper and saving Tom Cruise’s bacon^[1]; gangsters throwing money-launderers to the crocs^[2] and of course a whole, crazy, swinging scene out there of inter-marital jiggery pokery - the island is about the size of Poole so there's no real surprise people wind up in each others' spouses beds especially in hurricane season.

—Oh look! my car is in the neighbour’s tree!

—And so is my launch!

—And there’s the missus on the kitchen table of the neighbour’s condo!

Great Scott, I’m digressing. But did you have any idea writing board resolutions could be so exciting?

Me neither.

Anyhow, the sad cadre of London-bound lawyers who commission and then have to review this board minutes and only long for the exotic spice of island life. Is anyone every going to stump up to let you actually go out there?

The closest you will get is when the corporate service providers out there send you the annual thank-you for your custom over the year. By time-honoured tradition they do this by means of an air-mailed Tortuga Cayman Islands rum cake.

References

↑ John Grisham: The Firm. Possible, but highly implausible.
↑ Ben Affleck in Runner Runner. Preposterous. There aren't crocodiles in the Cayman Islands. “There are two types of crocodiles naturally found in the north-western Caribbean, namely the American and Cuban crocodile. The American crocodile (Crocodylus acutus) has a wide range and can be found in Cuba, Jamaica, Mexico and the Southern States. The Cuban crocodile (Crocodylus rhombifer) is only found in south-western Cuba. However, skeletal remains found locally indicate that historically both species were naturally present in the Cayman Islands. Many crocodiles have a “wandering” phase, in which young animals range far and wide in search of new habitat. The Cayman Islands falls within the natural range of both these species, therefore we should not be surprised at an occasional appearance off our shores.”
—Cayman Islands Department of Environment Director Gina Ebanks-Petrie.

[1] John Grisham: The Firm. Possible, but highly implausible.

[2] Ben Affleck in Runner Runner. Preposterous. There aren't crocodiles in the Cayman Islands. “There are two types of crocodiles naturally found in the north-western Caribbean, namely the American and Cuban crocodile. The American crocodile (Crocodylus acutus) has a wide range and can be found in Cuba, Jamaica, Mexico and the Southern States. The Cuban crocodile (Crocodylus rhombifer) is only found in south-western Cuba. However, skeletal remains found locally indicate that historically both species were naturally present in the Cayman Islands. Many crocodiles have a “wandering” phase, in which young animals range far and wide in search of new habitat. The Cayman Islands falls within the natural range of both these species, therefore we should not be surprised at an occasional appearance off our shores.”
—Cayman Islands Department of Environment Director Gina Ebanks-Petrie.

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