Farewell
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People Anatomy™
A spotter’s guide to the men and women of finance.
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There’s something poetic — melancholic — about the farewell email from a colleague whose name you didn’t recognise until the leaving card bearing it transported itself forlornly around the department’s in-trays a fortnight ago.
- I think most of you know by now that today is my final day[1]. I’m not a big fan of farewells so I won’t dwell too much on the past months — but I wanted to say thank you for each one of you for your support you have given me during my time here. It has been a privilege to work with some of the most incredible, passionate people in the industry! Wishing you all the best, the very best, both professionally and personally, and hoping we reconnect when our paths cross going forward! — Sandy
What to make of this: faintly passive aggressive thanks for nothing? A lack of irony? Or just no sense of perspective? Anyway, you can make it into poetry, as per the panel.
Even more fun can be had should the leaver be incautious enough not to use the blind copy field. The truly embittered might not: after all, what harm can that final faux pas — by which she reveals the breadth of the staff whose inboxes she is polluting — now do? Her career has hit the skids: could it be worse? Well, only if some well-intended bureaucrat deigns to reply-all. “Dear Fortesquieu: Thanks for your hard work and best of luck with your new job. You will be missed!”
This may kick off a viral bout of virtue-signalling from others, joining in to wish similarly vague, perhaps ironic, valedictions.
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References
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