You will know them by their arse-wiping attachment, their empathiser subroutines, for their tact at not mentioning that they could whup you at chess, and the leisure time they will vouchsafe you.

The Jolly Contrarian’s Glossary
The snippy guide to financial services lingo.™
Here I am, the brain the size of a planet, and I’m meant to wipe your arse. I mean, it’s great isn’t it?
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