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Disclaimer: Difference between revisions
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But do not let that stop you trying. | But do not let that stop you trying. | ||
If you distrust [[epistemology]] — if, as many [[lawyer]]s do, you just find unpunctuated silence uncomfortable — you can always slip in a [[disclaimer]]. Nothing gladdens an [[Mediocre lawyer|attorney]]’s heart more than one of these. Where a [[client]] sees such a page of tightly leaded | If you distrust [[epistemology]] — if, as many [[lawyer]]s do, you just find unpunctuated silence uncomfortable — you can always slip in a [[disclaimer]]. Nothing gladdens an [[Mediocre lawyer|attorney]]’s heart more than one of these. Where a [[client]] sees such a page of tightly leaded seven-point font as mere texture, his advisor will behold a thing of power, beauty, and precision impossible to articulate to the laity. A [[Ultimate disclaimer|good disclaimer]] bootstraps itself off the page and into three-dimensions, arcing gracefully into imagined geometries of space-time, disclaiming even itself into nothingness. | ||
To disclaim is definitively to say | To disclaim is definitively to say, for the eternal record, what you are ''not'' saying. | ||
===Nosferatu, or the [[unsaid]]=== | ===Nosferatu, or the [[unsaid]]=== | ||
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Thus, a [[disclaimer]] fills this unspoken septic hinterland with calming doggerel intended to dampen, insulate and inoculate those empty spaces, like so many polystyrene chips in a mail-order carton. | Thus, a [[disclaimer]] fills this unspoken septic hinterland with calming doggerel intended to dampen, insulate and inoculate those empty spaces, like so many polystyrene chips in a mail-order carton. | ||
In penning a disclaimer, spurn whatever commitment you have<ref>it is usually salutary and insincere</ref> to brevity. He must be stuff his prose with [[passive]]s, redundancies, jargon and [[double negative]]s. He must repeat himself, repeat himself again and, [[for the avoidance of doubt]], repeat himself. The less he says and the more elaborate the constructions he uses to say it, the better. | |||
Put it in seven point, the wrong font, margins skewiff at the back of the document, and label it “Important information that you must read”. BREAK INTO LONG TRACTS OF BOLD CAPITALS FOR NO OBVIOUS REASON. LABEL THEM A NOTICE TO NEW HAMPSHIRE RESIDENTS. | Put it in seven point, the wrong font, margins skewiff at the back of the document, and label it “Important information that you must read”. BREAK INTO LONG TRACTS OF BOLD CAPITALS FOR NO OBVIOUS REASON. LABEL THEM A NOTICE TO NEW HAMPSHIRE RESIDENTS. | ||