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''Perhaps there ''should'' be a rate'', he thought. The variance was easy enough to calculate, but ''knowing'' about it was a different thing to ''managing'' it. Instinctively, he knew there was something in this idea but could not figure out a way of monetising it. | ''Perhaps there ''should'' be a rate'', he thought. The variance was easy enough to calculate, but ''knowing'' about it was a different thing to ''managing'' it. Instinctively, he knew there was something in this idea but could not figure out a way of monetising it. | ||
In one of those cruel ironies to whose martial cadence our lives keep time, Barkley was laid off shortly afterwards | In one of those cruel ironies to whose martial cadence our lives keep time, Barkley was laid off and, shortly afterwards imprisoned for manipulating [[LIBOR]]. On release, he was obliged to find work wiping tables by night as he worked on his [[Fi-Fi]] novels and developed his derivative ideas. | ||
==== The first [[employment rate swap]] ==== | ==== The first [[employment rate swap]] ==== | ||
{{Drop|B|arkley’s fortunes would}} change following a chance encounter in an upscale cocktail bar in West London. | {{Drop|B|arkley’s fortunes would}} change following a chance encounter in an upscale cocktail bar in West London. | ||
As she neared her [[Schwarzschild radius of alcohol consumption|gin horizon]], Anita Dochter, a middle manager in compliance at [[Wickliffe Hampton Asset Management|Wickliffe Hampton]] bellyached to her old pal and erstwhile colleague [[Cass Mälstrom]]. | |||
At the time, [[Wickliffe Hampton]] — a sleepy mid-market broker — was losing hundreds of compliance and onboarding staff each month to venture capital-funded dot-com start-ups. [[Mälstrom]] was just one. She was now CIO of legaltech darling [[lexrifyly]] | |||
[[lexrifyly]] had no product to speak of, no business model, customers or plan but was flush with stupid amounts of cash, a great [[Microsoft PowerPoint|deck]] and an unshakable conviction in the wisdom of goosing its burn-rate by overpaying for bums it didn’t need on seats it didn’t have. | |||
“But,” complained Dochter, “we actually ''need'' our people. They actually do productive things for us. You know: [[MIS]] reports. Operational [[deep dive]]s. [[Netting]] audits .But unless we pay ''your'' stupid rates for them, which we cannot afford to do —” at this point she fell off her stool briefly — “and give them free fruit, unlimited working from home and a soft play area — they won’t stay with us. But, ''you'',” she hissed, clambering back up and jabbing [[Cass Mälstrom|Mälstrom]] on the lapel, “right now, ''you'' don’t need ''any goddamn'' staff: you just need to show your investors you are clever, imaginative and on point doing fashionably insane things. That does not take actual staff. So stop taking mine.” | “But,” complained Dochter, “we actually ''need'' our people. They actually do productive things for us. You know: [[MIS]] reports. Operational [[deep dive]]s. [[Netting]] audits .But unless we pay ''your'' stupid rates for them, which we cannot afford to do —” at this point she fell off her stool briefly — “and give them free fruit, unlimited working from home and a soft play area — they won’t stay with us. But, ''you'',” she hissed, clambering back up and jabbing [[Cass Mälstrom|Mälstrom]] on the lapel, “right now, ''you'' don’t need ''any goddamn'' staff: you just need to show your investors you are clever, imaginative and on point doing fashionably insane things. That does not take actual staff. So stop taking mine.” | ||