Middle management ouija: Difference between revisions

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-{{a|work|}}The curious void whence the profound daftness of most management conviction comes.
+{{a|work|
+[[File:Ouija.jpg|450px|thumb|center|Okay, so forced ranking, then?]]
+}}The curious void at the center whence the profound daftness of most management conviction comes.
-Who is it?
+Who is it? Whose bright idea was it, exactly, to oblige the staff to tilt at all these windmills?
-It is not the [[CEO]] — she floats above the fray, could care not a row of buttons about the federation of employees at all, much less the [[management information and statistics]] they might generate — and nor is it any of functionaries nominally in charge of the workstream, all of whom when quizzed on the topic will instantly agree that, for example, the 365 performance appraisal system is from its foundations up a nonce, achieving nothing but illicit patronage, resentment, rancour and demotivation, and will even cite the passage from ''HBR'' in 1975 that established this beyond all reason.
+It is not the [[CEO]]’s: she floats above the fray, above the messy operational layer. She could care not a row of buttons about the federation of employees at all, much less the [[management information and statistics]] they generate, as long as they are generating enough cash or, failing that, good works, to justify her salary.
-But while no single individual can be found to utter a word in favour of a silly idea, all will be certain that ''someone else'', way above their pay grade, perhaps even a ''lot'' of someone elses, all at so great a remove that one can scarcely imagine who they might be, never mind what drives their attachment to such a roundly derided management trope, is fixed upon it, and therefore it must happen.
+Nor will any of functionaries nominally in charge of the [[workstream]] own it.  When quizzed on the topic, every one will instantly agree that the 365 performance appraisal system is from its foundations up a nonce; it achieves nothing, wastes time, encourages bad behaviour and fosters resentment, rancour and demotivation. The more literate ones will even cite the passage from ''HBR'' in 1975 that established this beyond all reason.
-These mysterious conviction mannered are never identified, and somehow the collective unconscious pushes it on, as if willed by some inner daemon.
+But while none can be found with a single word to say for such a silly idea, all will be certain that ''someone else'' does. Someone way above their pay grade — perhaps even a ''lot'' of someone elses, all at so great a remove from the commonplace experience that one can scarcely imagine who they might be, never mind whence comes their affection for such a roundly derided trope. Not one will speak for it. Not ''one''. Yes still: as a collective, when they join hands and place them on the ''planchette'', they watch in terrible, fearful admiration as it strides about the agenda signalling for all their several doubts that as a collective they are firmly resolved upon it, and therefore it must happen.
-This is the middle management ouija board.
+This is the [[middle management ouija board]].
+{{sa}}