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{{script|Complicatio}}: My division’s damned, by unfunny fate <br>
{{script|Complicatio}}: My division’s consigned, by unfunny fate
To live unloved upon the ledger. We are but cost.<br>
To live life unloved upon the ledger. We are but cost.
’Tis the rust and stain and curse of clammy gears<br>
’tis the rust and stain of clammy machinery to require  
That require a ruinous peopling. <br>
Ruinous peopling by myriad technicians.  
We’ve cut our cloth as best can do<br>
Each is steep’d, til cup is cold, in arcane science.  
But these myriad needed grunts, though housed in meagre lairs <br>
Or hers, or theirs, or its, or xes —
Kept safe and well away from clientry, are yet a weight.<br>
I am thus and then obliged. I own the [[service line]]
Each speaks the fractious tones of jargoned tongue<br>
It falls to me to work their stretchèd silos,
Such patter steep’d, til cup is cold, in leaves of dismal science.<br>
Yoked and tethered as a measurèd beast —
Each a different dismal one, his language apt to smother. <br>
Upon whose saddled back our fiscal fate depends.
{{Script|Nuncle}}: We understand them not. Nor do they one other.<br>
And, O! Dilemma! The very men who work these chainèd cranks —
{{Script|Inclusivia}}: “His”?<br>
And women — and those unsure, or curious, or as yet unaligned—
{{script|Complicatio}}: Pray forgiveness, Lady Inclusivia. Hers as well.<br>
{{Script|Queen}}: The heavens doth anoint!
{{Script|Inclusivia}}: And theirs.<br>
{{script|Complicatio}}: Milady?  
{{script|Complicatio}}: Aye, them too. Yea, this is our strife: this bewild’ring ’scape <br>
{{Script|Nuncle}}: Pray, spare the conjugations, sir:
Of contraptions yoked and tethered as a many gender’d beast —<br>
Their majesty doth get the point.
Upon whose discombobulating backs our common fate depends. <br>
{{script|Queen}}: It is a pretty speech so far. But has it any meat?
And, O! Dilemma! The very men who work these chainèd cranks —<br>
{{script|Complicatio}}: I — we — ''they'' — are and am obliged.
{{Script|Inclusivia}}: Men? Just men?<br>
Those eager souls whose allied cadences power our jalopy
{{script|Complicatio}}: Oh! and women — and those unsure, or curious, or as yet unaligned—<br>
By their inevitable heft, they play as weighty anchors.
{{Script|Queen}}: The heavens doth anoint!<br>
{{Script|Nuncle}}: “Weighty anchors”? None call the Reverend Spooner!
{{script|Complicatio}}: Milady? <br>
{{script|Complicatio}}: Yegads, but are they inconstant. Oafish! Fickle! Slow!  
{{Script|Nuncle}}: Pray, spare your testy conjugation:<br>
I wouldst speed their outputs up, but worser comes with sooner.
Their majesty doth get the point.<br>
And so, my liege, my battle plan
{{script|Queen}}: It is a pretty speech so far. But has it any meat?<br>
 
{{script|Inclusivia}}: Or leguminous alternatives.  <br>
Yet herein will I imitate the sun,
{{script|Complicatio}}: I — we — they — am and are and are obliged.<br>
Who doth permit the base contagious clouds
They whose allied cadence powers our truck —<br>
To smother up his beauty from the world,
{{Script|Queen}}: The dismal ones?<br>
That, when he please again to be himself,
{{Script|Complicatio}}:  Aye them, with all their rancour —<br>
Being wanted, he may be more wonder'd at,
By their inevitable heft, they play as weighty anchors.<br>
By breaking through the foul and ugly mists305
{{Script|Nuncle}}: “Weighty anchors”? None call the Reverend Spooner!<br>
Of vapours that did seem to strangle him.
{{Script|Queen}}:  There are ''eighty'' of these dismal scientists? <br>
If all the year were playing holidays,
{{Script|Nuncle}}: More like eight hundred —<br>
To sport would be as tedious as to work;
{{script|Complicatio}}: Eager but, yegads, inconstant. Oafish! Fickle! Slow! <br>
But when they seldom come, they wish'd for come,
I wouldst speed my rate of stroke, only worser comes with sooner.<br>
And nothing pleaseth but rare accidents.
And so, my liege, my battle plan: we set these [[Morlocks]] free.<br>
So, when this loose behavior I throw off
{{Script|Queen}}: To do what?<br>
And pay the debt I never promised,
{{Script|Inclusivia}}: To see out their best and carefree lives, unchained of drudgery.<br>
By how much better than my word I am,
Uninjured by liv’d experience: happy, unstress’d — full, fair and abundant. <br>
By so much shall I falsify men's hopes;
{{Script|Nuncle}}: In other words, less gently put, they’ll make the lot [[redundant]].<br>
And like bright metal on a sullen ground,315
{{Script|Complicatio}}: Thus, unbound by work-to-rule, we’ll drive the train<br>
My reformation, glittering o'er my fault,
Around the clock, without relent<br>
Shall show more goodly and attract more eyes
Night; day; rain; hail or shine — e’en upon the Sabbath.<br>
Than that which hath no foil to set it off.
{{Script|Queen}}: Our crankshafts pedal not themselves, [[Complicatio]].<br>
I'll so offend, to make offence a skill;
You’ve said you’d let your [[subject matter expert|experts]] go, so<br>
Redeeming time when men think least I will.
Who shall turn thy grimy wheels, without fault or favour, food or rest?<br>
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{{Script|Complicatio}}: You can hire them by the score in [[Proverbial school-leaver from Bucharest|Bucharest]].<br>
They are legion: all thifty, keen and swift. <br>
{{Script|Queen}}: But unpossessed of needed knowhow that, by [[Redundancy|rank and yank]], you sent away?<br>
{{Script|Complicatio}}: There are certain merchants, Ma’am whose special skill <br>
Lies in collating squads of fruity youths, fresh harvested from school <br>
And putting them at our bespoke disposal.<br>
They bone them up upon our musty [[Playbook|almanacks]] —<br>
[[Service catalogue]]s, hymn-sheets, psalters, [[Risk taxonomies|taxonomies]] and the like<br>
And see them train’d, at pace, to keep to and stay upon our message. <br>
{{Script|Queen}}: What is this “special skill” whereof you speak? <br>
To coach a bunch of wet-eared boys —<br>
{{Script|Inclusivia}}:  — and girls, and grades between —<br>
{{Script|Queen}}: — to outperform our veterans? It sounds to us like sorcery. <br>
{{Script|Nuncle}}: “Outsourcery”, they call it. An amiable conjury,<br>
Well-known to bewitch a gawping treasurer.<br>
{{Script|Complicatio}}: ’Tis more than cheeky sleight of hand, my liege.<br>
{{Script|Nuncle}}: ’Tis not. You’ll see. The logic’s flimsy.<br>
{{Script|Complicatio}}: ’Tis tried, tested and pronounced a win<br>
By no lesser than McKinsey.<br>