82,891
edits
This is an auto-generated email: Difference between revisions
no edit summary
Amwelladmin (talk | contribs) No edit summary |
Amwelladmin (talk | contribs) No edit summary |
||
| (6 intermediate revisions by the same user not shown) | |||
| Line 1: | Line 1: | ||
{{a|work| | {{a|work|{{image|Dalek|png|Resistance is useless.}}}}Is there anything grimmer, in a [[High-modernist|high-modern]] working life strewn with grimnities, than an autogenerated email? It is so disempowering, so [[passive-aggressive]], so ''ignorant'' of every basic principle of a life well-lived, full of rich professional experience — a life to which our [[Human resources|dark overlord]]s pledge [[Virtue signalling|public, undying commitment]] — that you would think no thoughtful modern business administrator would dream of using it. | ||
But modern business administrators are thoughtful in the way modern yachts are dairy-free. | But modern business administrators are thoughtful in the way modern yachts are dairy-free. | ||
| Line 5: | Line 5: | ||
If we take it as a given that the optimal outcome to a newly-implemented process is 100% compliance without hesitation, repetition or deviation, let alone (God forbid!) ''complaint'', then it is no more than sensible product [[design]] to ensure your loud-hailer can go ''everywhere'' yet come from ''nowhere'' and, once supplicants have clocked its clangorous tone — in the comprehensively auditable ecosystem of a Microsoft Exchange server, they can hardly miss it, even if they ''do'' actually, you know, miss it — they have no choice but to bend their weary footsteps to its urgings, however preposterous the outcome of that action might be. | If we take it as a given that the optimal outcome to a newly-implemented process is 100% compliance without hesitation, repetition or deviation, let alone (God forbid!) ''complaint'', then it is no more than sensible product [[design]] to ensure your loud-hailer can go ''everywhere'' yet come from ''nowhere'' and, once supplicants have clocked its clangorous tone — in the comprehensively auditable ecosystem of a Microsoft Exchange server, they can hardly miss it, even if they ''do'' actually, you know, miss it — they have no choice but to bend their weary footsteps to its urgings, however preposterous the outcome of that action might be. | ||
But years of miserable life-experience tells us ''not'' take that as a given. | |||
Even well-designed processes rust over time — and those that envision the [[meatware]] playing “[[Simon Says]]” with an automated compliance system are ''not'' well-designed, let us be clear — so those responsible for them still need the occasional nudge to give the whole thing a going over with {{plainlink|https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2ofy6l|a wire brush and Dettol}} just to make sure it remains fit for purpose. This nudge usually comes from those [[Meatware|obliged to ''follow'' the process]] ''complaining'' about it. | |||
In this way are interests, theoretically, aligned: the [[meatware]] resents its time being wasted; [[middle manager]]s don’t enjoy being whined at, so the [[Systemantics: The Systems Bible|feedback loop]] balances itself into a kind of vaguely [[tiresome]] equilibrium. Every now and then, before things get properly absurd, [[Middle management ouija|middle management]] will overhaul the process to make it less of a pain — for everyone. | |||
The unmonitored, auto-generated email ''breaks'' that feedback loop. | |||
Now the [[user]] doesn’t know who sent the email, who owns the system, or whom to whine at. She may try to work it out, by searching [[Quantum indeterminacy|fruitlessly]] on the [[intranet]] —It is a truth universally acknowledged that no intranet contains any information that is both up-to-date ''and'' useful — but her wave of ire will eventually crest and she will go back to her other [[Tedium|tediae]], the matter unresolved. | |||
The responsible middle manager — if there is one, and we cannot now even be certain of that: for all we know, the system may have become self-aware, generating its own Kafkaesque processes — remains blissfully ignorant of the [[waste]] and exasperation. Indeed, unshackled from the responsibility of keeping the process serviceably un-stupid, she is free to create ''more'' wasteful processes, watched over by ''more'' unmonitored accounts, and for each one of them she can report a full slate of green indicators on her [[RAG status|RAG]] dashboard at the monthly [[opco]] [[stakeholder]] check-in. Compliance is ''inferred'' and when, as surely it will, something catastrophically breaks, [[internal audit]] must look ''ex machina'' for the fault in our stars and will find it, instead, in the mortal [[Human error|human hearts]] of the subject matter expert. Our care-free middle manager may even get a promotion. | |||
This really does happen. The aftermath of [[Archegos]] within the brokers was of exactly this character. | |||
{{sa}} | {{sa}} | ||
*[[You’ve been assigned a task!]] | *The auto-generated email that does not just ''warn'' you about something, or ''chide'' you for something, but ''[[You’ve been assigned a task!|actively gives you work to do]]''. [[You’ve been assigned a task!]] | ||
*[[Email]] | *[[Email]] | ||
*{{fieldguide}} | *{{fieldguide}} | ||
{{ref}} | |||