Trainee: Difference between revisions

The Harvard Law School careers fair is hardly the Russian front. These “poor little lambs” we hold in contemplation were not conscripted, press-ganged, nor frog-marched at gunpoint down to the Latham & Watkins barracks.  

To the contrary, these little blighters spent years climbing over each other ''specifically to get to where they now are''. This was their one goal: their guiding, blinding light. ''These people are trained killers''. They eat the weak. They are ''motivated'' to this penury. They ''want'' it. Five years of trench warfare is ''part of their plan''. They understand, the way [[LinkedIn|LinkedIn grandees]] seem to have forgotten, that ''[[Military school of life|what does not kill you makes you stronger]]''. Whoops: we promised to spare the [[Nietzsche]] quotes, didn’t we.

And remember, these babes-in-arms — armed babies, at any rate — are [[Charge-out rate|charged out]], from the moment they trade their joss-sticks & hacky-sacks for power-suits, at ''five hundred bucks an hour''. And they know ''nothing''. Their work is then triple-checked by some slightly older cherub who is paid ''nine'' hundred bucks an hour and knows barely any more. You are paying an effective rate of sixteen hundred bucks an hour for a kid you’d think twice about letting walk your dog.

It was, as we old lags are prone to say, ever ''thus''. Our [[Libtard|liberal metropolitan mores]] may wax and wane, but “ever thus” will it ''remain''. The career path of commercial lawyering is not, never has been, and never will be, for [[Die Schweizer Heulsuse|milksop]]<nowiki/>s. Those who have clambered over enough scuffling bodies to earn a [[big law]] training contract has, we presume, a deliberative faculty, and options, even in a tight labour market.