Statue of limitations

The statue of limitations was a colossal marble erection, five hundred cubits in height, that was expected to bestride the entrance to the Cycladean harbour of Santorini for a thousand years as a primordial testament to the perennial uselessness of humankind.

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In a titanic bout of irony, the statue collapsed under its own weight a week or so after completion, killing King Ozymandias, the fellow who commissioned it, and the entire race of proto-Greek epicureans who conceived of it. The administrators of Ozymandias’ estate lodged a claim against its sculptor, but due to a succession of bureaucratic misunderstandings and clerical mishaps, were delayed in filing their claim until, in a further compounding irony, it was thrown out by the Greek courts as being time-barred under the Statute of Limitations.

In a final irony, none of the people responsible for either the commissioning of the sculpture, its construction or the pursuit of the claim were sacked, and all enjoyed long, rewarding careers in middle management.

See also

• Limitation Act 1980 a.k.a. the Statute of limitations