Management consultant

One of those people with an MBA who is profoundly deaf to protest “that is easier said than done”, largely because a management consultant’s role is to say, while some other poor sap is expected to do.

In ordinary Euclidian space-time, there is a simple formula — not quite as elegant as E = MC², but close to it — which sets an immutable bound on the minimum time (t) required for a management consultant’s output (∞) to be implemented^[1], which must be longer than the maximum theoretical length (L) of the management consultant’s engagement (e').

T∞ >L_e'

Therefore, the management consultant will be long gone and onto the next job well before it becomes clear that the implemented changes are a disaster, and you won’t see him for dust.

References

↑ Careful: a management consultant’s output is never in called a “recommendation”: The art of management consultancy is to carry out countless chargeable hours precisely without doing that: the key is to elicit ideas from your client as to what to do, responsibility for which, when inevitably they fail, can safely be laid at the client’s own door.

[1] Careful: a management consultant’s output is never in called a “recommendation”: The art of management consultancy is to carry out countless chargeable hours precisely without doing that: the key is to elicit ideas from your client as to what to do, responsibility for which, when inevitably they fail, can safely be laid at the client’s own door.

[1]