Financial service

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The Jolly Contrarian’s Dictionary

The snippy guide to financial services lingo.™


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Financial service /fɪˈnanʃ(ə)l ˈsəːvɪs/ (n.)

“This planet has — or rather had — a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much of the time. Many solutions were suggested for this problem, but most of these were largely concerned with the movement of small green pieces of paper, which was odd because on the whole it wasn’t the small green pieces of paper that were unhappy.”

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An activity whereby a bunch of people without skin in the game pass your money back and forth between them, and keep a little bit each time.

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