Template:Workstream lead capsule: Difference between revisions
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Sounds glamorous; isn’t. | Sounds glamorous; isn’t. | ||
Firstly, “lead” in this context means “a thing you tie a misbehaving dog to” and not “what Moses did to the Children of Israel”. A | Firstly, “lead”, in this context, means, “a thing you tie a misbehaving dog to” and not “what Moses did to the Children of Israel”. | ||
A “workstream lead” is one engaged, as a [[contractor]], to prod unwilling employees along a manifestly pointless “business change” program, whereby outwardly useful staff will be distracted from whatever they are doing and instructed to strip paint off a [[bucket]], so the [[bucket]] can be given to another employee to paint properly, so a third one can strip paint from it again. And so on. | |||
Requires experience organising [[all-hands conference call]]s, walking through action logs and compiling [[dashboard]]s full of [[RAG status]]es. Until your contract runs out. | Requires experience organising [[all-hands conference call]]s, walking through action logs and compiling [[dashboard]]s full of [[RAG status]]es. Until your contract runs out. | ||
Latest revision as of 12:32, 5 December 2023
Sounds glamorous; isn’t.
Firstly, “lead”, in this context, means, “a thing you tie a misbehaving dog to” and not “what Moses did to the Children of Israel”.
A “workstream lead” is one engaged, as a contractor, to prod unwilling employees along a manifestly pointless “business change” program, whereby outwardly useful staff will be distracted from whatever they are doing and instructed to strip paint off a bucket, so the bucket can be given to another employee to paint properly, so a third one can strip paint from it again. And so on.
Requires experience organising all-hands conference calls, walking through action logs and compiling dashboards full of RAG statuses. Until your contract runs out.