Singulars and plurals: Difference between revisions
Jump to navigation
Jump to search
Amwelladmin (talk | contribs) Created page with "{{pe}}To what end the forensic remark “All references to the singular shall include the plural, and vice versa”? ask yourself this: Can you imagine your learned c..." |
Amwelladmin (talk | contribs) No edit summary |
||
| Line 1: | Line 1: | ||
{{pe}}To what end the forensic remark “All references to the singular [[shall]] include the [[plural]], and vice versa”? | {{pe}}To what end the forensic remark “All references to the singular [[shall]] include the [[plural]], and vice versa”? | ||
To your correspondent, none at all. This is throat-clearing, pointless text which, once in, benefits from the loving embrace of the [[anal paradox]], but fulfils no purpose whatsoever. No lawyer will ever object to it, but — and because — it plays no role in the legal meaning of the contract whatsoever. Can you imagine your learned counsel, [[Sir Jerrold Baxter-Morley, Q.C.]] standing up in court and learnedly submitted, to Lord Justice [[Cocklecarrot MR]]: | |||
:'''Sir Jerrold''': M’Lud, the defendant acknowledges that it was obliged to comply with the plaintiff’s procedures — it says exactly that in clause 93.5(c)(iii)(G) of the [[indenture]], it cannot be denied — but the vital point is this: the plaintiff only had ''one'' procedure. Its operations manager, Mr Strumpet, conceded as much in cross examination this morning. So my respectful submission, M'Lud, is that nowhere in this contract — nowhere — does it require the defendant to comply with a ''single'' procedure. And for this authority I respectfully submit —” ''here Sir Jerrold looks about wildly at his junior, Master Contrario, who looks back at him blankly.'' “— ah, as authority for this well established principle of English, ah, law —” ''here Sir Jerrold discreetly but violently jams the heel of his brogue into his junior’s shin.<br> | :'''Sir Jerrold''': M’Lud, the defendant acknowledges that it was obliged to comply with the plaintiff’s procedures — it says exactly that in clause 93.5(c)(iii)(G) of the [[indenture]], it cannot be denied — but the vital point is this: the plaintiff only had ''one'' procedure. Its operations manager, Mr Strumpet, conceded as much in cross examination this morning. So my respectful submission, M'Lud, is that nowhere in this contract — nowhere — does it require the defendant to comply with a ''single'' procedure. And for this authority I respectfully submit —” ''here Sir Jerrold looks about wildly at his junior, Master Contrario, who looks back at him blankly.'' “— ah, as authority for this well established principle of English, ah, law —” ''here Sir Jerrold discreetly but violently jams the heel of his brogue into his junior’s shin.<br> | ||
Revision as of 14:27, 31 October 2019
|
Towards more picturesque speech™
|
To what end the forensic remark “All references to the singular shall include the plural, and vice versa”?
To your correspondent, none at all. This is throat-clearing, pointless text which, once in, benefits from the loving embrace of the anal paradox, but fulfils no purpose whatsoever. No lawyer will ever object to it, but — and because — it plays no role in the legal meaning of the contract whatsoever. Can you imagine your learned counsel, Sir Jerrold Baxter-Morley, Q.C. standing up in court and learnedly submitted, to Lord Justice Cocklecarrot MR:
- Sir Jerrold: M’Lud, the defendant acknowledges that it was obliged to comply with the plaintiff’s procedures — it says exactly that in clause 93.5(c)(iii)(G) of the indenture, it cannot be denied — but the vital point is this: the plaintiff only had one procedure. Its operations manager, Mr Strumpet, conceded as much in cross examination this morning. So my respectful submission, M'Lud, is that nowhere in this contract — nowhere — does it require the defendant to comply with a single procedure. And for this authority I respectfully submit —” here Sir Jerrold looks about wildly at his junior, Master Contrario, who looks back at him blankly. “— ah, as authority for this well established principle of English, ah, law —” here Sir Jerrold discreetly but violently jams the heel of his brogue into his junior’s shin.
- Master Contrario (in abject agony): AAAARGH! (collapses in a dead-faint on the courtroom floor.)
- Sir Jerrold: Well, M’Lud I am obliged this is most unusual, but it appears my learned friend is in some difficulty and I would pray an adjournment while —
- Cocklecarrot MR: While the ground swallows you up, Sir Jerrold?