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{{def|Compensation|/ˌkɒmpɛnˈseɪʃən/|n|}}Investment banks are equally good at hyperbole and euphemism, the latter being a sort of inverted hyperbole, [[calculated]] to make the unseemly seem chaste; the trivial important, the quotidian grandiloquent and the ignoble dignified. Bankers are at their creative best when discussing their own pay. Of their number, none are more given to euphemism, and indeed hyperbole, than the good people of [[personnel]] or, as they like to think of themselves, ''[[human capital management]]''. You see? They can’t help it.
 
It is they who come up with bright ideas like "rebranding" your salary as, for example, “rewards”.
 
Now, being given a reward sounds like you’ve won a competition of skill, returned a missing whippet to its owner, or uncomplainingly completed a lifetime of selfless good works. A “reward” is that gold watch; a ticket to heaven; the football that every good boy deserves.
 
It doesn’t sound much like the filthy lucre that bankers get paid. Once upon a time, “rewards” were called “compensation” — another fine euphemism, but one markedly nearer the bone. After an absence, it is back in vogue. We like it because it makes pay ''sound'' a lot closer to what it ''feels'' like.
 
The word “compensation” speaks of redress for wrongs perpetrated. It conveys a salutary attempt at rectification; an act of economic recompense for the unspeakable spiritual ugliness one’s employment demands. “Compensation” implies a forlorn essay at correcting the inexpungible stain of moral compromise.
 
This, all agree, is the unavoidable price one must pay to persuade good men and women to devote their creative souls to the dark arts of financial service.

Revision as of 20:20, 2 February 2021

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Compensation /ˌkɒmpɛnˈseɪʃən/ (n.)
Investment banks are equally good at hyperbole and euphemism, the latter being a sort of inverted hyperbole, calculated to make the unseemly seem chaste; the trivial important, the quotidian grandiloquent and the ignoble dignified. Bankers are at their creative best when discussing their own pay. Of their number, none are more given to euphemism, and indeed hyperbole, than the good people of personnel or, as they like to think of themselves, human capital management. You see? They can’t help it.

It is they who come up with bright ideas like "rebranding" your salary as, for example, “rewards”.

Now, being given a reward sounds like you’ve won a competition of skill, returned a missing whippet to its owner, or uncomplainingly completed a lifetime of selfless good works. A “reward” is that gold watch; a ticket to heaven; the football that every good boy deserves.

It doesn’t sound much like the filthy lucre that bankers get paid. Once upon a time, “rewards” were called “compensation” — another fine euphemism, but one markedly nearer the bone. After an absence, it is back in vogue. We like it because it makes pay sound a lot closer to what it feels like.

The word “compensation” speaks of redress for wrongs perpetrated. It conveys a salutary attempt at rectification; an act of economic recompense for the unspeakable spiritual ugliness one’s employment demands. “Compensation” implies a forlorn essay at correcting the inexpungible stain of moral compromise.

This, all agree, is the unavoidable price one must pay to persuade good men and women to devote their creative souls to the dark arts of financial service.