Talentdämmerung: Difference between revisions
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There is some controversy about its provenance: some point to the self-interested work of {{Buchstein}}’s life-long antagonist {{jerrold}}, anxious to boost his consultancy fees. | There is some controversy about its provenance: some point to the self-interested work of {{Buchstein}}’s life-long antagonist {{jerrold}}, anxious to boost his consultancy fees. | ||
===Synopsis=== | ===Synopsis=== | ||
The Queen’s inner circle comprises: [[Complicatio]], who is responsible for the | ==== Act I ==== | ||
It is Venice in the 1890s. The mercantile markets are in disarray: there are brigands on the Silk Road, pirates around the Barbary Coast, and the arrival of venal bankers from the New World is threatening the profitability of the Venetian families. | |||
[[Provocatoria Presuntuosa|Provocatoria]], a minor Venetian noble and head of the Presuntuosa family, summons a council of her closest advisors to plan the firm’s survival. Our supply of gold ducats, once the envy of the world, is dwindling. I shall hand it over to those of you who can demonstrate their strategy for adapting to the new environment. | |||
The Queen’s inner circle comprises: [[Complicatio]], who is responsible for [[Operations|workings of the firm]]; [[Ingraziatore]], who looks after the firm’s best [[senior relationship manager|clients]], [[Index.php?title=Regolamento|Regolamento]], who is in charge of compliance, and the hapless [[Triago]], who is [[general counsel]]. Also present is [[Jeremiah Nuncle|Nuncle]], the Queen’s diminutive special advisor. | |||
Ingraziatore complains that there are insufficient people to build client relationships. Bands of roving mercenaries are picking off the firm’s most lucrative trade routes and diverting traditional riches to the Americans. There is but one thing for it: we must pay these roving mercenaries to bring the trade back to our firm! | |||
Complicatio immediately announces a programme to relocate the firm’s operations to [[Proverbial school-leaver from Bucharest|Bucharest]], to outsource those than cannot be transplanted to [[Don Inago Montega]], a local [[celery peddler]] who supplies cheap labour under water-tight [[service level agreement]]<nowiki/>s. This, he assures the Queen, will instantly save thousands of ducats. The Queen claps excitedly. [[Jeremiah Nuncle|Nuncle]] makes cynical asides throughout, but the Queen pays them no attention. | |||
Regolamenti has acquired a “homunculus” machine to surveil and ensure compliance with rules and procedures at a fraction of the cost, and with far greater speed and accuracy than humans can do. <ref>There are many aspects of the plot that, in passing, borrow from {{Buchstein}}’s other works, notably ''[[La Vittoria della Forma sulla Sostanza]]'', which featured a similar “Homunculus”.</ref> | |||
==== Act II ==== | |||
No sooner has Ingraziatore wasted all the firm’s resources on useless investment bankers, he returns to the Queen. Now our own staff are furious. These new fancy-pants are lording their great riches over everyone, but they have not brought in any new business. In fact they are making it hard for us to keep the business we already have. and now our own loyal staff are leaving. We must | |||
===Highlights=== | ===Highlights=== | ||
Most famous rousing aria, accompanied by the string section playing “piccolini” — literally, “tiny violins”; shortened violin-type instruments specially-designed by {{buchstein}} for this opera<ref>An idea later taken up by, among others, Wagner, who invented his own “[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wagner_tuba Wagner Tuba]” for the Ring.</ref> — comes when Prepostero, senior managing partner of [[magic circle law firm|Magic Circle]] firm ''Slaughter Cowards Later'' stands upon a white cliff overlooking jagged rocks of the tempestuous ocean between Albion and the New World, shaking his fists and wailing into the chasm: | Most famous rousing aria, accompanied by the string section playing “piccolini” — literally, “tiny violins”; shortened violin-type instruments specially-designed by {{buchstein}} for this opera<ref>An idea later taken up by, among others, Wagner, who invented his own “[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wagner_tuba Wagner Tuba]” for the Ring.</ref> — comes when Prepostero, senior managing partner of [[magic circle law firm|Magic Circle]] firm ''Slaughter Cowards Later'' stands upon a white cliff overlooking jagged rocks of the tempestuous ocean between Albion and the New World, shaking his fists and wailing into the chasm: | ||
Revision as of 15:25, 22 October 2022
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The complete works of Otto Büchstein
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Der Kampf um Talente, sometimes performed in Italian as La Lotta Per Attrarre Talenti (“The Struggle To Attract Talent”), is an unfinished operetta by winsome Austrian librettist and amateur composer Otto Büchstein. Never performed in his lifetime, or for that matter since, a fully-formed script was recovered from his belongings in the opium den in Mandalay where he spent his last, fevered months.
There is some controversy about its provenance: some point to the self-interested work of Büchstein’s life-long antagonist Sir Jerrold Baxter-Morley, K.C., anxious to boost his consultancy fees.
Synopsis
Act I
It is Venice in the 1890s. The mercantile markets are in disarray: there are brigands on the Silk Road, pirates around the Barbary Coast, and the arrival of venal bankers from the New World is threatening the profitability of the Venetian families.
Provocatoria, a minor Venetian noble and head of the Presuntuosa family, summons a council of her closest advisors to plan the firm’s survival. Our supply of gold ducats, once the envy of the world, is dwindling. I shall hand it over to those of you who can demonstrate their strategy for adapting to the new environment.
The Queen’s inner circle comprises: Complicatio, who is responsible for workings of the firm; Ingraziatore, who looks after the firm’s best clients, Regolamento, who is in charge of compliance, and the hapless Triago, who is general counsel. Also present is Nuncle, the Queen’s diminutive special advisor.
Ingraziatore complains that there are insufficient people to build client relationships. Bands of roving mercenaries are picking off the firm’s most lucrative trade routes and diverting traditional riches to the Americans. There is but one thing for it: we must pay these roving mercenaries to bring the trade back to our firm!
Complicatio immediately announces a programme to relocate the firm’s operations to Bucharest, to outsource those than cannot be transplanted to Don Inago Montega, a local celery peddler who supplies cheap labour under water-tight service level agreements. This, he assures the Queen, will instantly save thousands of ducats. The Queen claps excitedly. Nuncle makes cynical asides throughout, but the Queen pays them no attention.
Regolamenti has acquired a “homunculus” machine to surveil and ensure compliance with rules and procedures at a fraction of the cost, and with far greater speed and accuracy than humans can do. [1]
Act II
No sooner has Ingraziatore wasted all the firm’s resources on useless investment bankers, he returns to the Queen. Now our own staff are furious. These new fancy-pants are lording their great riches over everyone, but they have not brought in any new business. In fact they are making it hard for us to keep the business we already have. and now our own loyal staff are leaving. We must
Highlights
Most famous rousing aria, accompanied by the string section playing “piccolini” — literally, “tiny violins”; shortened violin-type instruments specially-designed by Büchstein for this opera[2] — comes when Prepostero, senior managing partner of Magic Circle firm Slaughter Cowards Later stands upon a white cliff overlooking jagged rocks of the tempestuous ocean between Albion and the New World, shaking his fists and wailing into the chasm:
It is more beautiful in the original Italian, so we set that out in full, with a translation below.
Oh, Fato, con le tue sfortunate oscillazioni ed errori di valuta scandalosa
Mi hai gettato nell’abisso della disperazione!
Non sono amato! Sono desolato!
Come posso cambiare le mie bollette senza valore
Per servizi giuridici di alto livello nel nuovo mondo?
Oh, fato, mi schiacci!
La guerra per il talento era già dura
Ma tu pesista nel renderlo più difficile!
Questo si aggiunge a quello che era già un ambiente difficile.
Dei, schioccati le guance!
Segna le mie parole! Ascolta quello che ho da dire!
Questo sarà un catalizzatore per più movimenti laterali
“O, Fate, with your unfortunate swings and errors of outrageous currency
You have cast me into the abyss of despair!
I am unloved! I am desolate!
How can I exchange my worthless bills
For top-tier juridical services in the new world?
O, Fate, you crush me!
The war for talent was already tough
But you must pesist in making it harder!
This adds to what was already a challenging environment.
Gods, crack your cheeks! Mark my words!
Heed what I have to say!
This will be a catalyst for more lateral moves”
The “More With Less” Aria
Another memorable moment is when Prepostero, having been told by his major client’s general counsel Triago that the firm’s reserves are depleted and he will have to economise on external legal spend. Prepostero peremptorily snuffs out the candles and exits his client’s chamber. “I shall be the judge of that,” he roars. “Whose hand controls the whip, dost though think? Surely you don’t think it is you?” He spits, before leaving poor Triago distraught on the floor, from where he embarks on the beautiful, lachrymal aria Dovremo Solo Fare Di Più Con Meno (“We shall just have to do more with less”) only to be interrupted by the court jester Triago, listening from a nearby window, who snipes sardonic rejoinders to each of Triago’s complaints.
Triago: When the master says, “Thou shalt do more”
I am thus obliged: I shall do more:
For legal art is the whole of the law.
And when he says “thou shalt take less”
It is the same: less shall I take.
With crumbs and crusts do shall I make.Nuncle: Whose legal income’s stretched so thin
To play so small a violin?Triago: Oh manifold skill! Flow like a stream
About the smooth stones of demand!
Collaboration? Oh, blast my eyes!
How we strive to operationalise
But how to vouchsafe service deliv’ry
With fewer dressed in legal livery?
What wouldst thou give for this old rope?
A measley mill or two?Nuncle: You’ll cope.
Triago: Oursource! Rightshore! By this peroration
I endorse the yen for automation.
I’ll take the strain and with aught stress
But living breath, do more with less.Nuncle: Oh, bless.
It’s easier than that:
You’ll just do less.
References
- ↑ There are many aspects of the plot that, in passing, borrow from Büchstein’s other works, notably La Vittoria della Forma sulla Sostanza, which featured a similar “Homunculus”.
- ↑ An idea later taken up by, among others, Wagner, who invented his own “Wagner Tuba” for the Ring.