Moronic CGI inventions

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We introduce a new subcategory of LinkedIn snit: the CGI “engineering” invention designed to ameliorate the effects of an extremely remote contingency, with a complex mechanical contraption which would itself be likely to malfunction, potentially injuring or decapitating those it is meant to save in the process, and requiring expensive construction and subsequent maintenance out of all proportion to the identified peril.

Earthquake bed

The “prepacked coffin” earthquake bed:

Detachable airplane cabin

The self-disassembling-when-already-malfunctioning-in-mid-air plane:

The breaching whale train

The pint-sized-train-appearing-from-the-bowels-of-the-earth-at-a-level-crossing: We can't stop watching this. It just gets stupider and stupider each time you see it.

Why would anyone engineer an underground train to spontaneously pop out of the ground at a level crossing?

What happens to the cars that are on the road when it splits in half? Do they just collapse into a chasm?

Who are these teeny little high speed trains meant to be for in the first place? Subterranean gnomes? Where are they going, and what’s the hurry? Why the need to terrorise Earthling pedestrians?

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