Schrödinger uncertainty

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The dishwasher door is closed.

This means a state of Schrödinger uncertainty exists as regards the dishwasher: it may be clean or dirty (or, in quantum states, technically, it could be clean *and* dirty) but there is no external knowledge (i.e., knowledge existing outside the dishwasher) of its state of cleanliness.

This presents a legal conundrum.

The modified version of Hammurabian code that governs the Jolly Contrarian’s kitchen places the obligation on the “finder” to empty a clean dishwasher. What a finder has not found cannot hurt him: Quod si vos non invenient eam, nocere tibi non potest.

But, but, but.

The kitchen sink is filled with used plates. This indicates a state of wilful blindness/constructive knowledge. Allowing this situation to persist would undermine the constitution and risks turning the kitchen into a no man’s land, where grubby-faced angels fear to tread.

The director of family prosecutions is taking instructions. Traps are being set.