Money

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The Jolly Contrarian’s Glossary
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“I don’t need money. I need questions answered.
Question number one: Can I have some money?”
—Ford Fairlane, in The Adventures of Ford Fairlane, Rock ’n’ Roll Detective

A simple, but gravely misunderstood thing.

It is misunderstood by tech people (bitcoin isn’t cash; it’s a fraudulent asset); by people who ask for client money protection from a bank, and by those who aspire to take security over it.

Cash is not an asset. It is not property. Cash is is a token of abstract value. It is a will ’o’ the wisp, a woodland sprite, an ephemerality which floats freely of the mortal chains of commerce. It is like Sandy Denny, or one of those free-spirited hippie types that dances round toadstools: It cannot be owned, only held[1] — which is another way of saying whoever holds it owns it, outright, against all the world. Cash requires your total commitment, or nothing: you can’t futz around with it, you can’t declare a trust over it, pledge it, or hold it for anyone other than yourself.

Try telling that to a US attorney, of course. Undoubtedly they’ll have found a way of granting security over cash, which will make about as much sense as rehypothecation. It probably involves rehypothecation, come to think of it.


See also

References

  1. Girl Guides: Ford! Ford! We just needed to be held!

    Ford Fairlane Rock ’n’ Roll Detective: Well, you got the bonus plan. Ohhhhhhhh.