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The closest you will get is when the [[corporate service provider|corporate service providers]] out in their occasionally inclement paradise send you their annual thank-you for your custom: By time-honoured tradition, they do this by means of an air-mailed Tortuga [[Cayman Islands rum cake]]. | The closest you will get is when the [[corporate service provider|corporate service providers]] out in their occasionally inclement paradise send you their annual thank-you for your custom: By time-honoured tradition, they do this by means of an air-mailed Tortuga [[Cayman Islands rum cake]]. | ||
This may seem meagre compensation but don’t be fooled. Just wait till you taste that bad boy. Tortuga cakes are stone-cold ''amazing''. They may arrive looking like they have been pummelled by baggage handlers at every depot across the Florida keys — in fairness they probably have — but the | This may seem meagre compensation but don’t be fooled. Just wait till you taste that bad boy. Tortuga cakes are stone-cold ''amazing''. They may arrive looking like they have been pummelled by baggage handlers at every depot across the Florida keys — in fairness they probably have — oh, but the ''taste''. Like a great, sopping, golden sponge, if you squeezed it, it would wring out pure golden, tropical nectar. For a second you will be bodily transported to that sun-kissed, philandering, intermittently-windy financial utopia. | ||
And then you will snap back to the tattoo of drizzle against your window. Boy, it’s dark out there. | |||
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