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[[File:Screenshot 2020-11-05 at 18.39.20.png|450px|thumb|center|It’s the Real Thing.]] | [[File:Screenshot 2020-11-05 at 18.39.20.png|450px|thumb|center|It’s the Real Thing.]] | ||
}}[[discredit derivatives|Discredit derivatives]] are a class of [[derivatives]] invented by pioneering [[derivatives]] guru | }}[[discredit derivatives|Discredit derivatives]] are a class of [[derivatives]] invented by pioneering [[derivatives]] guru {{author|Hunter Barkley}} to allow [[alternative investment funds]], who had lazily committed to [[environmental, social, and corporate governance]] standards in their [[prospectus]]es as a cheap way of wowing [[virtue-signalling]] [[Ultimate client|investors]], not realising that anyone would ''really'' object to massively profitable leveraged investments in firearms, narcotics and [[financial weapons of mass destruction]]. This they largely held true — no-one ''does'' care about that in the City — until the European Commission got in on the act and hold European-regulated [[hedge fund]]s to account for false advertising if they claimed the sanctimony of [[ESG]] on paper but ignored it in practice. | ||
Barkley’s idea was simple: if it was okay to extract the crappy credit profile from a [[CDO squared|portfolio]] of [[mortgage|mortgages]] off and lay ''that'' off on someone with “sufficiently deep market expertise and advanced models to bear the risk indefinitely”,<ref>Yes, I know what you are thinking: a sleepy Landesbanken from Lower Saxony would be ''exactly'' such a someone, right?</ref> why not do the same thing with the unwanted ignomy of outrageous investments? | Barkley’s idea was simple: if it was okay to extract the crappy credit profile from a [[CDO squared|portfolio]] of [[mortgage|mortgages]] off and lay ''that'' off on someone with “sufficiently deep market expertise and advanced models to bear the risk indefinitely”,<ref>Yes, I know what you are thinking: a sleepy Landesbanken from Lower Saxony would be ''exactly'' such a someone, right?</ref> why not do the same thing with the unwanted ignomy of outrageous investments? |