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But yea, in the year 2021 it came to pass. Of the low-born retail investors emerged a ''counter-Horcrux'' of great power: at least as powerful as the Lehman. Advancing buy-sider soldiers were stopped in their tracks; bogged down; beaten off. What is this new sorcery? They cried. | But yea, in the year 2021 it came to pass. Of the low-born retail investors emerged a ''counter-Horcrux'' of great power: at least as powerful as the Lehman. Advancing buy-sider soldiers were stopped in their tracks; bogged down; beaten off. What is this new sorcery? They cried. | ||
The forces stood at an impasse for weeks. No quarter was given. Then, a single, small, brave [[prime broker]] clambered out of her trench, stood up and walked calmly into a clearing, utterly unarmed, waving a [[margin lock-up]] in front of her. | The forces stood at an impasse for weeks. No quarter was given. Then, a single, small, brave [[prime broker]] clambered out of her trench, stood up and walked calmly into a clearing, utterly unarmed, waving a white [[margin lock-up]] in front of her. | ||
What the hell is she doing? | ''What the hell is she doing?'' | ||
The little negotiator raised the | The little negotiator raised the parchment above her head, and ''tore it into a thousand pieces''. | ||
From their trench, her comrades quailed. “Someone stop her! This is ''suicide''! She will kill us all!” | |||
As they pulled back the arms of their monstrous trebuchets you could hear the [[buy-side legal eagle|buyside soldiers]] laugh. “Finish them off, Melvin!” cackled one. “We’ll be having brokers for breakfast in the morning!” | |||
But then | But then the brave little negotiator shrieked at the top of her lungs, “[[GameStop|EXPECTO GAMESTOPIBUS]]!!!” And there, in the sky, a dazzling, luminous, snorting apparition appeared. A great, pearlescent, archer, flinging arrows of burning destruction into the crowded shorts of the buy-side. | ||
“It’s ... ''Robin Hood''!” mouthed the sell-siders, in awe and wonder. | |||
The colossal trebuchets imploded. A great wind flattened the buy-side encampments. Sigils burned. Their mercenary forces scattered to the four corners of the earth. | |||
Back in the village, [[Zarathustra]] stood on his rock, observing the smoke on the horizon. “One day you will no longer see your loftiness, and your lowliness will be all too clear; your very sublimity will frighten you like a phantom. Then you will cry: ‘''the world is a lie!''’” | |||
{{sa}} | {{sa}} | ||