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The Taxonomy of Doom: An Opco Boone Adventure: Difference between revisions
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The Taxonomy of Doom: An Opco Boone Adventure (view source)
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{{a|opcobooneadventure|}}<div style="text-indent: 20px;">When [[Opco Boone|Opco]], Algy and | {{a|opcobooneadventure|}}<div style="text-indent: 20px;">When [[Opco Boone|Opco]], Algy and [[Janice]] filed into the ''Defence Against Indemnities'' classroom, [[Columbia Cavalier|Professor Cavalier]], was nowhere to be seen. Instead, a stout middle-aged management consultant sat at her desk, peering intently through a monocle at a clockwork contraption installed upon it. The machine was labelled “RISK TAXONOMISER”. The badge on her lapel announced her as [[Imelda Skanks]], [[Master of Business Administration|M.B.A.]]. | ||
As the class settled in she gleefully twiddled the dials on the machine’s fascia. | As the class settled in she gleefully twiddled the dials on the machine’s fascia. | ||
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Professor Skanks manipulated the knobs. As she did so, the children could see drive-shafts turning interlocking gears, which drove connected flywheels, which spun tiny fan-belts, which rotated brass ratchets, which triggered a row of winking diodes and a bell that softly pinged. Her eyes betrayed an impish delight at the cleverness of the design: the elegance of the interactions; the intricacy of the machinery. | Professor Skanks manipulated the knobs. As she did so, the children could see drive-shafts turning interlocking gears, which drove connected flywheels, which spun tiny fan-belts, which rotated brass ratchets, which triggered a row of winking diodes and a bell that softly pinged. Her eyes betrayed an impish delight at the cleverness of the design: the elegance of the interactions; the intricacy of the machinery. | ||
[[Janice]] looked at Boone. Boone shrugged. Algy had started cutting up his India rubber<ref>In contravention of Skool Rule 66(c) para 3: See {{Br|How To Be Topp}}, G. Willans & R. Searle, 1954</ref> in preparation for a barrage against the little swot in the front row, so paid no attention. | |||
Eventually, the Professor pressed a button marked “ANALYSE”. The machine whirred, rattled, chattered, and eventually spat out a punch-tape from a dispenser at the bottom and dropped into a stainless steel tray. Boone thought he saw a wisp of smoke drift up from the mechanism. | Eventually, the Professor pressed a button marked “ANALYSE”. The machine whirred, rattled, chattered, and eventually spat out a punch-tape from a dispenser at the bottom and dropped into a stainless steel tray. Boone thought he saw a wisp of smoke drift up from the mechanism. | ||
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“Well, Roly, measured against that ambient risk, legal operating costs are too high!” | “Well, Roly, measured against that ambient risk, legal operating costs are too high!” | ||
[[Janice]] put her hand up. The Professor nodded to her to carry on. “How can you tell what the ambient risk is, just by looking at that machine, Professor?” | |||
“Can anyone answer that?” | “Can anyone answer that?” | ||
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Algy, still preoccupied with his rubber, was not paying attention and therefore reacted as if he has been shot. “Er —” | Algy, still preoccupied with his rubber, was not paying attention and therefore reacted as if he has been shot. “Er —” | ||
[[Janice]] kicked him in the shins under the table. “''[[Side letter]]!''” she hissed. | |||
Algy rubbed his shin and glared at her. “Ah, a side letter, Miss?” | Algy rubbed his shin and glared at her. “Ah, a side letter, Miss?” | ||
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Again, the Professor pretended not to hear. “Anyone?” | Again, the Professor pretended not to hear. “Anyone?” | ||
“[[Hold harmless]] executed under seal by [[deed poll]]?” volunteered | “[[Hold harmless]] executed under seal by [[deed poll]]?” volunteered [[Janice]]. | ||
“''Heavens'' no! What ''has'' Professor Bumblebore been teaching you?” | “''Heavens'' no! What ''has'' Professor Bumblebore been teaching you?” | ||