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Amwelladmin (talk | contribs) (Created page with "{{a|repack|{{image|bondrunner|jpg|}}}}{{dpn|/aʊtˈstændɪŋ/|adj}} Of a debt security, live, still out there, not redeemed. A simple enough thought, but one which is not beyond our learned fiends to complicate. Now, here is one of those times that the JC sides with the machines. In an attempt to reduce a mushy and tiresome definition to something simple, the JC proposed this: {{quote|'''Outstanding''': All the Notes in issue that have not been redeemed, purch...") |
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Of a [[debt security]], live, still out there, not redeemed. A simple enough thought, but one which is not beyond our learned fiends to complicate. Now, here is one of those times that the JC sides with the machines. | Of a [[debt security]], live, still out there, not redeemed. A simple enough thought, but one which is not beyond our learned fiends to complicate. Now, here is one of those times that the JC sides with the machines. | ||
In | In a valiant, but ultimately foolish, attempt to reduce a mushy and tiresome definition of “outstanding” in a [[Debt security|Note]] prospectus to something simple, the JC proposed this: | ||
{{quote|'''[[Outstanding]]''': All the Notes in issue that have not been redeemed, purchased and cancelled or become void under their Conditions.}} | {{quote|'''[[Outstanding]]''': All the Notes in issue that have not been redeemed, purchased and cancelled or become void under their Conditions.}} | ||
This came back in the mail, with a note of costs, marked back up | This came back in the mail, with a note of costs, marked back up more or less how it started: | ||
{{quote|'''Outstanding''' or '''outstanding''': in respect of the Notes of a Series, all the Notes of such Series issued except: | {{quote|'''Outstanding''' or '''outstanding''': in respect of the Notes of a Series, all the Notes of such Series issued except: | ||
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}} | }} | ||
In a fit of exasperation, the JC asked [[NiGEL]], his friendly little chatbot, to | There is no universe in which the concept of outstanding is so doubtful that you need to waste that much ammunition on it. In a fit of exasperation, the JC asked [[NiGEL]], his friendly little chatbot, to translate that back into a sentence of no more than 20 words. [[NiGEL]], bless him, came up with this: | ||
{{quote|“'''Outstanding'''” means all Notes issued except those redeemed, void, cancelled, or replaced. Notes held by the Issuer are not outstanding.}} | {{quote|“'''Outstanding'''” means all Notes issued except those redeemed, void, cancelled, or replaced. Notes held by the Issuer are not outstanding.}} | ||
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[[Exasperated Kermit face]]. ''Doubly'' exasperating, actually, because NiGEL’s attempt is marginally better than the JC’s original attempt. | [[Exasperated Kermit face]]. ''Doubly'' exasperating, actually, because NiGEL’s attempt is marginally better than the JC’s original attempt. | ||
It did lead the JC to wonder, Rick Deckard-like, whether he is not, himself, after all, a replicant. | It did lead the JC to wonder, Rick Deckard-like, whether he is not, himself, after all, a replicant. This would make a great play. | ||
Having said that, I have just had the mental image of seeing the JC as Rick Deckard in {{br|Blade Runner}}, but Deckard’s revelation comes not as he is hanging by his fingers off a dripping building, picked out by swatching searchlights while Rutger Hauer moodily stamps on his dislocated fingers and riffs improvised interstellar war poetry at him, but in generic conference room, facing off against a [[Linklaters]] capital markets associate in a beige cardigan armed only with an infinite capacity for detail. | |||
So, actually, it ''wouldn’t'' make a good play at all. It really, really wouldn’t. | |||
{{Sa}} | |||
* [[Conservation of tedium|The law of conservation of tedium]] | |||