From The Jolly Contrarian
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People Anatomy™
A spotter’s guide to the men and women of finance.
Some cooped-up libtards singing Imagine yesterday. No seriously, they were.
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“I hate conservatives but I really fucking hate liberals”.

—Matt Stone

/ˈlɪbtɑːd/ ~ portmanteau of “liberal” and “retard” (n.)

An excellent name for we paid-up members of the metropolitan liberal elite — and if you are reading this, I’m afraid that most certainly means you, dear friend, for we — yes, it includes the JC too —who have truck with the world of financial services are, by self-identification, libtards[1] — because those most discomfited by the label are those who most deserve it, tweaking as it perfectly does every righteous, passive aggressive nerve in their right-minded psyche.

And before you ask — for the avoidance of doubt, should the first person plural above have not been enough to get you across the line — yes, the JC is most definitely a libtard.

As he was mowing his small patch of communally-owned, non-capitalist-means-of-production land this morning (with a hand-held sickle and a hammer, naturally) it occurred to the old goat that there might be a distinction between normal liberals and “libtards”, which might release him from that stigma: Libtards are liberals because they think they do know what’s best for everyone else. Normal liberals are liberals because they are pretty sure they don’t.

See also


  1. The honourable exemption being our good friends in in the Nashville negotiation community, and then only because if they admit to being libtards they’re liable to get shot at.