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Legal eagle: Difference between revisions
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The legal eagle is actually a bird, genus [[Chicken licken|''lingebant ulcera pullum'']]. It is flightless and lays nice nest-eggs. | The legal eagle is actually a bird, genus [[Chicken licken|''lingebant ulcera pullum'']]. It is flightless and lays nice nest-eggs. | ||
{{ | {{egg}} | ||
One trained in the law, genus ''[[causidicus mediocris]]'', whose principle fear is being blind-sided by the very language — English — in which {{sex|she}} must ply her trade. Such individuals are uniquely susceptible to [[Schwarzschild radii]]. When you press her why she must so persistently desecrate her calling, she will tell you this: | |||
“My drafting may be convoluted, but it is effective: It must be, for we haven’t had any [[litigation]] on it.” | |||
If you have the patience, this is the time to wheel out your pre-prepared joke: | |||
{{box| | |||
===The standard issue drafting joke=== | |||
“Did you know”, you say, “that, for a disguise, [[elephant]]s paint the soles of their feet yellow, and hide upside-down in custard?” <br> | |||
“Why, that’s preposterous!”<br> | |||
“Aha! but have you ever ''seen'' an [[elephant]] hiding upside-down in custard?”<br> | |||
“No, of course not!”<br> | |||
“SHOWS WHAT A GOOD DISGUISE IT IS.”<br>}} | |||
Walk proudly away. Your work is done. Of course it won’t make a blind bit of difference, but you may feel better. | |||
All lawyers are philosophers; good lawyers are just bad ones. Bad lawyers are worse. They have nothing on philosophers, though, who are terrible lawyers. The pits. | |||
{{Sa}} | |||
*[[Legal]] | *[[Legal]] | ||
*[[Sales]] | *[[Sales]] | ||
*[[ | *[[Counsel]], but not under any circumstances [[council]]. | ||
*[[Hary Poter]], [[muggle]]s, [[mudblood]]s and so on. | |||
{{ | {{C2|latin|metaphor}} | ||
{{ref}} | |||