Second law of worker entropy: Difference between revisions

From The Jolly Contrarian
Jump to navigation Jump to search
No edit summary
No edit summary
 
(18 intermediate revisions by the same user not shown)
Line 1: Line 1:
{{g}}{{a|confcall|}}
{{a|work|}}{{second law of worker entropy}}
[[Confusion entropy]] is the background level of misunderstanding and resentment which comes as a by-product of modern corporate discourse.


Different types of activity generate more or less of this kind of entropy. [[Conference call]]s — especially [[all-hands conference call]]s — generate dangerously high levels. Especially — when considering the RWA implications of a past event that might have happened, but didn't. Add accountants in different jurisdictions, tax people and transaction lawyers to converse directly on this topic and [[infinite bafflement]] is assured.
There is no formula for when or where this might happen because at that moment the [[JC]] was trying to make one up<ref>You do realise everything on this wiki is just made up on the spot, don’t you?</ref> he was [[Conference call ambush|ambushed]] with an ambiguous request for [[KPI]]s by an officious [[management consultant]]. He pretended to be having [[Skype trouble]] but lost his train of thought and never quite recovered it.


The [[Jolly Contrarian]]’s [[second law of worker entropy]] states that [[confusion entropy]] will eventually lead to the [[boredom heat death]] of the universe. There is no  formula for when or where this might happen because at that moment the [[Jolly Contrarian]] was trying to make one up he was ambushed by an officious [[management consultant]] on an [[all hands conference call]] and asked for some [[KPI]]s. He pretended to be having [[Skype trouble]] but lost his train of thought and never quite recovered it. Story of his life, really.  
[[Confusion entropy]] can be cured with [[Schwarzschild radius of alcohol consumption|alcohol]], but there is a curious [[paradox]], as overdoing the sauce (which, on a [[conference call]], can be tremendously tempting) can itself lead to total collapse through the [[inebriation event horizon]] into a black hole of soul-crushing despair.


[[Confusion entropy]] can be cured with alcohol, but there is a curious paradox, as overdoing the sauce (which, on a [[conference call]], can be tremendously tempting) can itself lead to total collapse through the [[inebriation event horizon]] into a black hole of soul-crushing despair.
So it’s either crushing your soul into an infinitesimal point of [[space-time]], or regressing to a sunless, tepid expanse having, in every direction except the one you want to go in, an infinite extension of [[ennui]].


So it’s either crushing your soul into an infinitesimal point of space-time, or regressing to a sunless, tepid expanse having, in every direction except the one you want to go in, an infinite extension of [[ennui]].
{{sa}}
 
*[[Laws of worker entropy]]  
{{seealso}}
*[[Entropy]]
*[[First law of worker entropy]]
*[[Second law of worker entropy]]  
*[[Schwarzschild radius of alcohol consumption]]
*[[Schwarzschild radius of alcohol consumption]]


{{draft}}
{{draft}}
{{ref}}
{{c2|cosmology|work anthropology}}
{{c|tedium}}
{{C|Laws of worker entropy}}

Latest revision as of 08:36, 13 October 2022

Office anthropology™
The JC puts on his pith-helmet, grabs his butterfly net and a rucksack full of marmalade sandwiches, and heads into the concrete jungleIndex: Click to expand:
Tell me more
Sign up for our newsletter — or just get in touch: for ½ a weekly 🍺 you get to consult JC. Ask about it here.

The JC’s second law of worker entropy: The latent confusion entropy in a complex system increases geometrically with the size of that system. Once a system, or organisation, is over a certain size, its resting-state confusion and implicit mediocrity quotient will fall out of stable equilibrium, eventually leading to the implosion of the organisation or, if it is big enough, boredom heat death of the universe itself.

There is no formula for when or where this might happen because at that moment the JC was trying to make one up[1] he was ambushed with an ambiguous request for KPIs by an officious management consultant. He pretended to be having Skype trouble but lost his train of thought and never quite recovered it.

Confusion entropy can be cured with alcohol, but there is a curious paradox, as overdoing the sauce (which, on a conference call, can be tremendously tempting) can itself lead to total collapse through the inebriation event horizon into a black hole of soul-crushing despair.

So it’s either crushing your soul into an infinitesimal point of space-time, or regressing to a sunless, tepid expanse having, in every direction except the one you want to go in, an infinite extension of ennui.

See also

References

  1. You do realise everything on this wiki is just made up on the spot, don’t you?