Let’s take it offline: Difference between revisions
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1. A sure sign, in an [[all-hands conference call]] , that some ingénue has made the fatal mistake of dropping through the cloudbase of cliché and into the inconvenient world of substance and detail, a grim place of intractable ugliness that is immune to resolution by crystalline management theory. You have as much chance of persuading a management consultant to embrace the actual workings of daily life as you have persuading someone who quite likes steak to help slaughter a cow. | 1. Noun. A sure sign, in an [[all-hands conference call]] , that some ingénue has made the fatal mistake of dropping through the cloudbase of cliché and into the inconvenient world of substance and detail, a grim place of intractable ugliness that is immune to resolution by crystalline management theory. You have as much chance of persuading a management consultant to embrace the actual workings of daily life as you have persuading someone who quite likes steak to help slaughter a cow. | ||
Fortunately, there’s a ready made defence. Expect a hasty plea to “[[take it offline]]” which, by tonal inflection, you might read as: | Fortunately, there’s a ready made defence. Expect a hasty plea to “[[take it offline]]” which, by tonal inflection, you might read as: | ||
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*“how about you just shut your cake-hole and let the [[change management]] [[workstream]] lead run the project, counselor?” (hostile). | *“how about you just shut your cake-hole and let the [[change management]] [[workstream]] lead run the project, counselor?” (hostile). | ||
2. Lawyer slang for “''You'' are a total moron”. | 2. [[Mediocre lawyer|Lawyer]] slang for “''You'' are a total moron”. | ||
3. Lawyer slang for “''I'' am a total moron”; | 3. [[Mediocre lawyer|Lawyer]] slang for “''I'' am a total moron”; | ||
{{plainenglish}} | {{plainenglish}} | ||
{{draft}} | {{draft}} | ||
{{egg}} | {{egg}} | ||
Revision as of 16:54, 21 May 2018
1. Noun. A sure sign, in an all-hands conference call , that some ingénue has made the fatal mistake of dropping through the cloudbase of cliché and into the inconvenient world of substance and detail, a grim place of intractable ugliness that is immune to resolution by crystalline management theory. You have as much chance of persuading a management consultant to embrace the actual workings of daily life as you have persuading someone who quite likes steak to help slaughter a cow.
Fortunately, there’s a ready made defence. Expect a hasty plea to “take it offline” which, by tonal inflection, you might read as:
- “let’s set aside some time to drill down into detail just the two of us, sort it out, and circle back with a bit more granularity later in the day” (benign); or
- “ugh — let's kick the can down the road and maybe something else will intervene to mean we never have to figure out the answer to that” (neutral); or
- “how about you just shut your cake-hole and let the change management workstream lead run the project, counselor?” (hostile).
2. Lawyer slang for “You are a total moron”.
3. Lawyer slang for “I am a total moron”;
Plain English Anatomy™ Noun | Verb | Adjective | Adverb | Preposition | Conjunction | Latin | Germany | Flannel | Legal triplicate | Nominalisation | Murder your darlings