Close-out! Close-out! Close-out! An Opco Boone Adventure

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The Adventures of Opco Boone, Legal Ace™
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Boone arrived with the lawyers just as the paramedics were dragging Dan Grade out of the office. The Chief Credit Officer was pale but, Boone thought, still alive, though it may have been the dancing firelight reflecting on his waxen face.

The huge head trader ushered them in. GC Fryer went first, her crack team of ED commandos in formation behind her. They snapped to attention.

Bosanquet shrugged in studied insouciance.

Fryer said, “At Ease, eagle squad.”

Bosanquet’s office was usually a model of masterful tranquillity. Today, toppled piles, deal toys and tombstones were strewn across the floor. Vestigial smoke curled from an ashtray full of Gauloise butts.

A stack of Iron Mountain boxes wobbled next to the conference table where a pair of whimpering traders were frantically punching tabulators and annotating a giant chart. The Bloomberg terminal winked & flashed angry red.

Across the city, the mechanical whine of ancient air raid sirens filled the air.

Boone noticed the office had a clear view across the Wharf at Wickliffe Hampton tower. It billowed and burned.

“So, listen up.”

Bosanquet dropped a single sheet on his desk and eyed the lawyers. Boone scanned the doc. It was a list. He glommed the theme, fast.

WHAM Asia Investments Limited
WHAM Cayman Finance Limited
WHAM Group Limited
WHAM London Investments Limited
WHAM Mortgage Funding Limited
WHAM Pacific Mortgage Limited
WHAM Properties Limited
Wickliffe Funding (UK) Limited
Wickliffe Hampton Enterprises Limited
Wickliffe Hampton Europe Limited
Wickliffe Hampton Holdings Plc
Wickliffe Hampton International Europe
Wickliffe Hampton LBO Investments Limited
Wickliffe Hampton Limited

Bosanquet gestured at the inferno outside the window, “Wickliffe ’Ampton are, ’ow say you, fouqued. We ’ave great exposure to zem. Eet is extremely volatile.”

One of the traders looked up and squeaked. Bosanquet growled at him in machine-gun French. He got back to punching and scribbling.

“I need to know ’ow we can close zem out. Vitement. Comprendez-vous?”

Chip Fryer picked up the sheet, regarded it, and nodded confidently.

“Yes, Florian. We understand. These are my best ISDA ninjas. We will pull the docs and have a comprehensive answer for you in seventy-two hours. All right, team let’s —”

“— you say, seventy-two hours?”

“That’s right!” Chip beamed.

“I want to know in seventy-two seconds. We will be dead in seventy-two hours.”

Chip blanched.

At that moment the paramedics returned.

See also