Sales

The Jolly Contrarian’s Glossary The snippy guide to financial services lingo.™ Go Premium Index — Click the ᐅ to expand: Glossary Comments? Questions? Suggestions? Requests? Insults? We’d love to 📧 hear from you. Sign up for our newsletter.

Salesmen and women are the great boon and utter bane of every commercial enterprise; as aggravating yet vital to the organisation’s well-being as the clients they bring, lured by the promise of leveraged alpha, hooked on the magnificent mating displays of backtesting.

Once a client is in the door, Salespeople function as its proxy in the great interior monologue of a modern investment bank.

Which is why they will instinctively parrot that great lie: “all our other counterparties have agreed this”.

The collective noun for a group of salespeople is a “bullshit”.

See also

• collective nouns
• Vendor, with which you should not confuse a salesperson. A vendor implies some kind of probity and responsibility for something material in the world.
• Compliance arbitrage, something at which all good salespeople are masters.
• Escalation

Dramatis personae: CEO | CFO | Client | Employees: Divers · Excuse pre-loaders · Survivors · Contractors · The Muppet Show | Middle management: COO · Consultant · MBA | Controllers: Financial reporting | Risk | Credit | Operations | IT | Legal: GC · Inhouse counsel · Docs unit · Litigator · Tax lawyer · US attorney Lawyer | Front office: Trading | Structuring | Sales |