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[[File:Aviary 1403065550574(2).jpg|thumb|right|[[Chicken Licken]], yesterday]]
{{a|glossary|{{image|Aviary 1403065550574(2)|jpg|[[Chicken Licken]], yesterday}}}}Once upon a time, an acorn fell on Chicken Licken’s head. Being [[Mediocre lawyer|legally qualified]] and rightly concerned about the risk that this would be [[Recharacterisation|recharacterised]] as evidence that the sky was falling, Chicken Licken rushed off at once to warn the King<ref>In this alternative universe, the King was predisposed to heed warnings from neurotic [[domestic animals]].</ref>. On {{sex|her}} journey, Chicken Licken met other [[Mediocre lawyer|dumb animals]] whom she persuaded [[title transfer collateral arrangement]]s might be [[recharacterisation|recharacterised]] as [[secured loan]]s, [[credit derivative]]s as [[insurance contract]]s, and [[synthetic PB]] as [[cash equity]], and that a client’s [[insolvency administrator]] might [[cherry-pick]] their [[out-of-the-money]] [[derivative]] positions and before long the [[legal]] department numbered 400 and had an annual spend of £800m.  
Once upon a time, an acorn fell on Chicken Licken’s head. Being [[Mediocre lawyer|legally qualified]] and rightly concerned about the risk that this would be [[Recharacterisation|recharacterised]] as evidence that the sky was falling, Chicken Licken rushed off at once to warn the King<ref>In this alternative universe, the King was predisposed to heed warnings from neurotic [[domestic animals]].</ref>. On {{sex|her}} journey, Chicken Licken met other [[Mediocre lawyer|dumb animals]] whom she persuaded [[title transfer collateral arrangement]]s should be [[Recharacterisation|recharacterised]] as [[secured loan]]s, [[credit derivative]]s as [[insurance contract]]s, and [[synthetic PB]] as [[cash equity]], and before long the legal department numbered 400 and had an annual legal spend of £800m.  


But they all ran into a fox who duped them all to rush into its lair, where it ate them all up.
But they all ran into a fox who duped them all to rush into its lair, where it ate them all up.


The nervy animals never made it to the King, who remained blissfully unaware of the impending collapse of the sky. In the mean time he has made a small fortune trading [[delta-one]] equity derivatives.
The nervy animals never made it to the [[King Cnut|King]], who remained blissfully unaware of the impending collapse of the sky. In the mean time, he was making a small fortune trading [[delta-one]] equity derivatives until one day [[King Cnut|the tide came disobediently in and drowned him]].<ref>Moral of the story: [[Brexit means Brexit]].</ref>


{{box|
===The standard issue drafting joke, [[chicken-licken]] edition===
'''The standard issue drafting joke'''
{{elephants in custard}}
 
“Did you know”, you say, “that, for a disguise, [[elephant]]s paint their toenails red, and hide in cherry trees?” <br>
“Why, that’s preposterous!” your adversary will cry.<br>
“Aha! but have you ever ''seen'' an [[elephant]] hiding in a cherry tree?”<br>
“No, of course not!”<br>
“SHOWS WHAT A GOOD DISGUISE IT IS.”<br>}}


===On the other hand===
===On the other hand===
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*[[Enron]]
*[[Enron]]


{{c2|Egg|Metaphor}}
{{c3|Egg|Metaphor|Risk}}
{{ref}}
{{ref}}
__NOTOC__

Latest revision as of 20:35, 20 September 2022

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Once upon a time, an acorn fell on Chicken Licken’s head. Being legally qualified and rightly concerned about the risk that this would be recharacterised as evidence that the sky was falling, Chicken Licken rushed off at once to warn the King[1]. On her journey, Chicken Licken met other dumb animals whom she persuaded title transfer collateral arrangements might be recharacterised as secured loans, credit derivatives as insurance contracts, and synthetic PB as cash equity, and that a client’s insolvency administrator might cherry-pick their out-of-the-money derivative positions and before long the legal department numbered 400 and had an annual spend of £800m.

But they all ran into a fox who duped them all to rush into its lair, where it ate them all up.

The nervy animals never made it to the King, who remained blissfully unaware of the impending collapse of the sky. In the mean time, he was making a small fortune trading delta-one equity derivatives until one day the tide came disobediently in and drowned him.[2]

The standard issue drafting joke, chicken-licken edition

“Did you know that, for a disguise, elephants paint the soles of their feet yellow, and hide upside-down in custard?”
Trouble me not with such nonsense.”
“But have you ever seen an elephant hiding upside-down in custard?”
“No —”
“SHOWS WHAT A GOOD DISGUISE IT IS.”

On the other hand

Arthur Andersen. If you need any more explanation of this, you really haven’t being paying attention in the last 15 years.

See also

References

  1. In this alternative universe, the King was predisposed to heed warnings from neurotic domestic animals.
  2. Moral of the story: Brexit means Brexit.