Middle management blues: Difference between revisions

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Stop all the [[key performance indicator]]s, cut off the skype <br>
{{Songbook|}}
Prevent [[internal audit]] complaining with a load of old tripe,<br>
Silence the [[subject matter expert]]s and with animated [[deck]]<br>
Bring out the [[target operating model]], which [[stakeholders]] will wreck.<br>


Let [[escalation]]s circle, rise and then dip <br>
''With apologies to W. H. Auden''<ref>[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Funeral_Blues Funeral Blues]</ref>.
Scribbling on the sky the message “Can you run it by [[Chip]]?”<br>
Put [[service level agreement]]s round the necks of the [[service line]],<br>
Let the [[chief operating officer]]s wear black cotton [[flannel|flannelene]]<br>


You are my [[steerco]] and [[opco]], my [[verbiage]], my pass, <br>
Stop all the [[key performance indicator]]s, cut off the [[Skype]]<sup>®</sup> <br>
My [[CBT]], my [[CPD]] (at which I am [[Best in class|best in the class]])<br>
Stall [[internal audit]] with a load of old tripe,<br>
Silence the [[subject matter expert]]s, and with animated [[deck]]<br>
Bring out the [[target operating model]], <br>
That [[stakeholder]]s will wreck.<br>
 
Let [[escalation]]s circle, [[Circle of escalation|rise]] and then dip <br>
Scribble on the sky “can you run it by [[Chip]]?”<br>
Put [[service level agreement]]s round the [[service line]]’s necks,<br>
Let the [[chief operating officer]] wear [[flannel|flannelene]] kecks.<br>
 
You are my [[steerco]] and [[opco]], my [[SOX]] audit pass, <br>
My [[CBT]], my [[CPD]] (where I’m [[Best in class|best in the class]])<br>
My [[deep dive]], [[disclaimer]], my [[eye-ess-dee-aye]];<br>
My [[deep dive]], [[disclaimer]], my [[eye-ess-dee-aye]];<br>
They said that [[conference call|call]] would last ten minutes:
They said the [[conference call|call]] would take minutes:
It lasted all day.<br>
It lasted all day.<br>


[[Please be advised]]  put out every one,<br>
[[Please be advised]]  that they’ve [[Outsourcing|outsourced]] the fun,<br>
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun,<br>
[[Right-sizing|Right-sized]] the moon — <br>
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood;<br>
Disintermediated the sun.<br>
For nothing now can ever come to any good.<br>
They’ve [[circle the wagons|circled their wagons]] and [[reach around|reached around]] the group;<br>
{{dramatis personae}}
For our [[direction of travel]] is a [[Mobius loop]].<br>
 
{{c|Peotry}}
{{ref}}

Latest revision as of 17:59, 28 November 2020

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With apologies to W. H. Auden[1].

Stop all the key performance indicators, cut off the Skype®
Stall internal audit with a load of old tripe,
Silence the subject matter experts, and with animated deck
Bring out the target operating model,
That stakeholders will wreck.

Let escalations circle, rise and then dip
Scribble on the sky “can you run it by Chip?”
Put service level agreements round the service line’s necks,
Let the chief operating officer wear flannelene kecks.

You are my steerco and opco, my SOX audit pass,
My CBT, my CPD (where I’m best in the class)
My deep dive, disclaimer, my eye-ess-dee-aye;
They said the call would take minutes: It lasted all day.

Please be advised that they’ve outsourced the fun,
Right-sized the moon —
Disintermediated the sun.
They’ve circled their wagons and reached around the group;
For our direction of travel is a Mobius loop.

References

  1. ↑ Funeral Blues
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