Management consultant: Difference between revisions
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A management consultant will necessarily be long gone and onto the next job well before it becomes clear that the changes that were implemented as a result of his consultancy are a disaster (again, be careful never to describe these as “recommendations”: A management consultant can ask open questions by which a firm can navigate its own way to “water”, but it cannot make it drink). When the enormity of the situation has descended upon all [[stakeholder]]s you will not see him for dust. Someone’s posterior will be required for kicking, and most likely it will be the [[head of the documentation unit]]. | |||
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Revision as of 15:17, 1 June 2017
One of those people with an MBA who is profoundly deaf to protest “that is easier said than done”, largely because a management consultant’s role is to say, while some other poor sap is expected to do.
In ordinary Euclidian space-time, there is a simple formula — not quite as elegant as E = MC2, but close to it — which sets an immutable bound on the minimum time (t) required for a management consultant’s output (∞) to be implemented[1], which must be longer than the maximum theoretical length (L) of the management consultant’s engagement (e').
- T∞ >Le'
A management consultant will necessarily be long gone and onto the next job well before it becomes clear that the changes that were implemented as a result of his consultancy are a disaster (again, be careful never to describe these as “recommendations”: A management consultant can ask open questions by which a firm can navigate its own way to “water”, but it cannot make it drink). When the enormity of the situation has descended upon all stakeholders you will not see him for dust. Someone’s posterior will be required for kicking, and most likely it will be the head of the documentation unit.
Dramatis personae: CEO | CFO | Client | Employees: Divers · Excuse pre-loaders · Survivors · Contractors · The Muppet Show | Middle management: COO · Consultant · MBA | Controllers: Financial reporting | Risk | Credit | Operations | IT | Legal: GC · Inhouse counsel · Docs unit · Litigator · Tax lawyer · US attorney Lawyer | Front office: Trading | Structuring | Sales |
References
- ↑ Careful: a management consultant’s output is never in called a “recommendation”: The art of management consultancy is to carry out countless chargeable hours precisely without doing that: the key is to elicit ideas from your client as to what to do, responsibility for which, when inevitably they fail, can safely be laid at the client’s own door.